Sunday, November 24, 2013

What to do...

Dear Internet Friends,

You may recall, a few years ago I was heckled in a fairly explicit way by some "youngsters." A few teens and a few "almost teens." Hubs and I were seriously thinking about getting a dog anyway, but this really got the ball rolling and within three weeks, young (yet large) Brubeck came to live with us.

I never had an encounter with said kids again, but on occasion a passerby would cross to the other side of the street as Bru and I approached. Even though my guy is very nice, he's 95 pounds and it feels  nice to be perceived as having protection by my side. All was well in Annapolis.

I could dress him up to be intimidating, but it might be more effective if he didn't have such a great smile. 
A few weeks ago, I peeked out the window when Bru barked at a couple of big kids being rowdy on skate boards in the street. They were making barking noises to get Bru going.

"Hee-ey cute face," the big kid shouted up.

A little surprised, as I was annoyed at how loud he was being, I replied, "Oh, thanks. I think he's cute too," as I proudly patted my handsome boy on his head.

"I don't care about your dog, I mean you!"

Insert record screech sound here. Wha?!?! Kid thinks he's got swagger.  I go about my business until a few minutes later I hear, "Byyyyye, cute face!!"  Dude, this kid can't be more than twelve years old. I'm a little unsettled, but shake my head and laugh. When I told my co-workers they howled with laughter.

Unfortunately, what he bellowed up next left me not sure if I'm prude, or rightfully disturbed. I hesitate before even typing the words....."Oh wait, Caesar wants to suck your boob!!!!" My co-workers were less amused and hubs laughter ceased when I told him that part.

A few days go by, and "cute face," escalates to "where you walking hot-stuff?" Sigh.

"Tell him his Mom's hot-stuff!" one co-worker suggested. The problem is, if he had a proper Mom, he probably wouldn't be saying such inappropriate things, so it's probably not going to help if I can't act like an adult.

Not wanting to evoke any sort of retaliation, while wondering in the back of my mind what he's going to say or do next, much less in a few years, I've succumbed to politely waving and acknowledging the name "cute face." Brubeck has started to low-growl and grumble when we walk past. Other neighbors have seen him throw rocks and try to enter a house, uninvited with two barking pit-bulls inside.  This afternoon, he raised his middle finger when Bru woofed at him from the window as they trampled through my front yard. Kid is officially an ass.

So now dear internet friends, I'm at a crossroads. What would you do? On the one hand, it's kind of funny. On another, more accurate hand, it's not funny at all and I don't know what to do. I mean, my initial thought was to get another scarier dog, but that's clearly not going to work. (It seems I baby the "scary" out of dogs. Oops.) Oh, and kids not remotely deterred by them anyway.

Thanks in advance,

Cute Face




1 comment:

The Vegetable Assassin said...

Well you ARE a cute face, but man, I'd be uncomfortable too. Little shits. Plus they're twelve NOW but one day they'll be massive sixteen year old hoodlums and then it's way less innocent. I have no doubt if anyone ever touched you, Bru would show them touching. Yup.