Thursday, October 29, 2009

Night Notes on Wednesdays....

Ooops. Who do I think I am? What year is this? Out until last call on a Wednesday night? Good grief. I had special permission to check out Nat's new bar last night. We didn't take such an opportunity lightly.

The Lounge   10/28/2009

Kristen: We're a three person costume.

Julie: Lava's got nothin' on couch cushions.

Julie/Kristen/Jud: It was all downhill after the big trash can.

Julie: I forgot about the crack incident!

Jud: Slow walker and Jumex weren't going to help her.

Matt: It's that little bit on the tip that wags a bit.

Jud: Swing his d*#&. Write it on the napkin bitch!!

Jeff: Who doesn't dance under the right circumstance?

(After 2am)

Julie: Standing on street corners.....................

So that's that. We truly planned on a low key evening, but then we were accosted by a criminal defense lawyer and his acquitted architect friend who's opening lines were, "Let me introduce you to the owner Stan."  We really didn't need any introductions since I'm sleeping with live with the  resident sommelier and furthermore we already know all the important people we make our own introductions.  They tried to roofie and paint nude portraits of us but we weren't having it obviously. We began to tire of them after this transaction.

Acquitted Architect: Oh, you're in school. What are you? In 11th grade?
Julie: (rolls eyes) Why yes. I'm 17 years old.
Acquitted Architect: Well come here!!!!
Kristen: Now we know what he was acquitted for.

Around this time, my friend Matt from England appeared, rescued us from the sleaze, grabbed a table and happily obliged our british translation demands, which fortunately for me, he never tires of. Before long Jud showed up, and shortly after that my friend Chris, then our Tsunami friends and suddenly it was 2 o'clock in the morning, Kristen was talking wedding photography to our new friend Mike and I was having a deep philosophical(ish) conversation with a girl named Courtney while wondering what happened to our one glass of wine and realizing I'd be lucky if I made it home in time for the second showing of Chelsea Lately. Which I did. Bonus.

Next up... Come and knock on my door for some Halloween Night Notes. I'll be waiting for you.

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

You smell like a Poptart!

Oh, how I adore last minute mini road trips! Two Saturdays ago, it was cold, rainy and generally speaking les mis and I was enjoying some hard core snuggle time on the couch with my Nat, my electric blanket and two books. In the name of fun, we snapped out of that and headed to Kurt and Kristi's in Baltimore around 7pm. From there six of us had some wine, (duh) a few tasty treats and piled into van that was playing "Rocky Horror Picture Show. (Side note, I'd never seen RHPS, so it was interesting when a few minutes in, everyone including Nat started saying "JANET!" I had no idea!)

Anyway, it was about 9:30pm and we were en route to Philly. We had tickets to the midnight tour of the Eastern State Penitentiary Haunted House. I was apprehensive but I didn't want to be spoil sport since Nat was percolating with excitement, so I put on my brave face. Long story short, after arriving promptly at 11:30pm we didn't actually get in until 2am. But from there, it was well worth the wait.

We were first taken into a room and basically told the rules. Something about don't smoke or touch any of the actors and they won't touch you. (Riiiiiiight) The next 45 minutes consisted of non-stop spooks and scares around every corner. I tightly gripped Kristi's hand as we moved forward and a ghoul came at me saying I smelled like a poptart. (I think he was cleverly calling me a "tart" however.)  I cowered and looked away. Hidden windows flew open and hands darted out at us. Watch guards sprang from behind buses when you were expecting them from another direction. Prisoners heckled you with arms reaching out behind bars from mazes where you can't quite stay out of their grasp. Smoke machines filled a long hallway where more prisoners dressed in black and eerie orange randomly lined the walls unconstrained and your only question was who was going to approach you. By this time, I had latched my paws onto Nat and he practically had to pull me through this hallway. As suspected, the final man lurched towards me and though I was expecting it, I leaped so high in the air with yelp I almost fell when I landed. (It didn't help that the guy actually did run into me.) We passed through the hospital area where a crazed mad scientist type sniffed us and screeched our blood types while a body lay abandoned on the surgery table. Next up, an all too calm dentist glared at us and aimed his drill. The next room smelled burnt and we viewed decomposing corpses.

The 3-D room was my favorite. Florescent paint splattered black sheets lined the walls and hands grabbed at us. Again, they weren't supposed to touch us, but one actually knocked my glasses off. Next up was the pitch black area. We were given flashlights but mine wasn't working. I mostly just closed my eyes at this point, buried my face in Nat's back and held on as he led the way. I did open them in time to see body hanging at an angle that no body should ever be in reach out and grab Nat. I think he squealed in delight.

Four hours total travel time, two hour line and forty-five minutes of Haunted House fun equaled a total blast when mixed with such great friends!!! We hit up a Waffle House around 4:30am on the way back and ordered plenty of carbs and hot chocolate to thaw out. We didn't find our way back to Annapolis until 6:30 in the morning. Well past my bed time even in my crazy years, but I'd do it all over again next year!

Monday, October 26, 2009

Haiku Monday

Wine with boot camp girls.
Family in Cobb Island.
Two scary movies.

I know the point of Haiku Monday is to wrap up the weekend quickly, but I feel this one needs a short explanation. Friday night, I popped over to my friend Faiths place. She was having happy hour at her house and several ladies I know from taking a boot camp class at the gym were there. We consumed LOTS of wine.  If there had been a napkin, I would have written down that Anonymous said "Wait to sleep with him until you can't wait any longer." Those may or may not be my words to live by.

Saturday night my whole family drove to Cobb Island for a family function. Loved it.

Sunday, I had a costume conference with Kristen and Judd. Things are sizing up nicely for our Chrissy, Janet and Jack, Three's Company outfits! I borrowed Coraline from her thinking it would be something nice to unwind too after Nat and I got back from viewing Paranormal Activity. Let's just say, I'm not sure which movie spooked me more!

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Night Notes on Tuesdays

Is that title to imply I was out and about on a Tuesday night consuming alcoholic beverages? I can not tell a lie. I was hunkering down on the couch with my love gearing up for a night of Food Network and snuggling when I received a text message from a friend who needed a stiff drink. We changed our clothes swift-like and popped up the street to the Irish Pub. The following occurred:

Fado 10/20/09

Julie: I passed up.
Jud: Passed up?...Oh, like passed up on consciousness?

Nat: We might even get to the point where we have to drink that Cherry Pucker!

Kristen: I hope my boob tastes like that.

Kristen: Julie and I didn't like each other at first.
Julie: And then we did, and then we didn't, and then we did again.

Bubble Gum and Pineapple

Love you K!

Monday, October 19, 2009

Haiku Monday!

Eastern State Penitentiary

The bone chilling rain
added to the effect of
Philly's Haunted House

Thursday, October 15, 2009


Last night I opened the cover to a new novel and was greeted with the opening (paraphrased) paragraph.

"Mary and Katharine had reached a point in the evening from whence there was no return. They had half a bottle of Tanqueray. They had limes. Plenty of ice. The hell of it was, they were out of tonic water." **

Does that not just make your heart smile? Before I got any further into the book I realized it was 11 and Chelsea Lately was coming on so I summoned Nat to the couch so against his will. It was then that Chelsea commented that her next book was coming out soon!!! Not only do I love Chelsea and her shoes, but her books are hilarious!

I awoke to a damp, dark morning and wanted nothing more than to stay snuggled in pajamas and read all day. The chill had the exact same feel as it did when I was a kid and would wake up before everyone on a Saturday and settle back into bed with a Beverly Cleary or Judy Blume number and later RL Stine and Christopher Pike.

My reading has been put on hiatus this summer because I got involved in The Count of Monte Cristo, swore I wouldn't read anything else until I finished and then halfway into it got stuck. Kristen  and Nat are both not pleased with me. I'll finish it one day I promise, but in the mean time, it's nice to get back to having a non-stop leisurely read handy. (Just finished a biography on Stephen King.)

What are you guys reading?

(In the mean time, I'm going to go ahead and click the "lackluster" button below this post for you. I know its a boring one. My apologies.) (But seriously, has anyone else noticed how fabulous Chelsea Handlers shoes are?)

** Little Bitty Lies, by Mary Kay Andrews

Monday, October 12, 2009

Haiku Monday

Hocus Pocus Witch!
Sarah and Noah visit.
Me and Stephen King.

Young Noah, almost crawling!

You know the drill. What did you guys do this weekend?

Sunday, October 11, 2009

1994 called...

It wants its plaid back. Seriously. Last month after purchasing a purple sweater I was forced against my will to buy a plaid shirt because every other article of clothing in the entire mall was plaid patterned. I like my trends. I wore ponchos 5 years ago when they were available in every material for 5 seasons straight. (I think it lasted 2 winters.) I wore the hell out of some groucho pants until they had fuzz balls on them before I gave them up. I even wore platform shoes in the late 90's. But this plaid phenomenon has gone far enough! While I can appreciate it for what it is, form fitting and much more polished than when paired with a Kurt Cobain t-shirt, it's still plaid, its still  country and I don't need one for everyday of the week to wear with my express editor pants and pumps. Why must every store insist on carrying 18 different cuts and colors of this trend? Plus, it's only been 15 years since it was in style the first time. I feel 30 years minimum need to pass before improving and bringing back something.

Don't even get me started on not being able to find a sweater that doesn't involve a turtle neck. Just don't.

Did someone say Vera Bradley? I'm filled with rage and must change away from the topic of fashion. (though V. Bradley is one of the most diabolically, puzzling, monstrosities of trends I have ever witnessed. Will it please die? Since when are the amish setting the style standard?!?!?! I shutter at the thought of mixing plaid with that quilt shit and you know I'm going to see it and it's going to send me into state of panic and anger and convulsions of hatred for people who don't know who to match because I thought we all learned not to mix patterns when we five unless we were Carrie Bradshaw in which we can mix and match and flash our bra-straps and halter tops all over town to our hearts content while wearing leg warmers, stilettos and a fanny pack and still make it work, and further who does this "Vera" think she is, using the name of a reputable designer. There. I've said it.... What was I talking about?)

Anyway, my cuz over at Go Redskins Go God Dammit and I had a very informative video chat when he mentioned the miracles of vitamin B-1 in association to hangover prevention. You heard it here first. Not only does cuz rocket around in a gold jet pack with a matching gold necklace because he's a busy guy, he's also a pharmacy student so you know he's a reputable source. If you have any doubts, have no fear. I'll be testing out his tried and true theory just to be certain I'm passing along valid information. I almost got good and liquored up tonight for the sole purpose of being able to post tomorrow with a full scientific report, but since I didn't have any drinking buddies available at short notice to act as a control so we will just have to wait. But believe me. Cuz wouldn't steer anyone wrong, particularly on the topic of abusing enjoying an alcoholic beverage.

Good night all. Looking forward to Haiku Monday!

Friday, October 9, 2009

Night Notes at Their Best...

I found this gem of a Night Note in a notebook last night and had to share. I mean, what is better than a bunch of friends drawing up official documents to be signed and agreed upon while readily consuming large quantities of liquor? Exactly. Only good can come from it. Ish.

Harry Browne's 6/8/07

This eighth day of June, 2007, *Kristen Saunders, Matt Johnson and Patrick Noble agree that the two losers of the game of scrabble which is to be played Saturday, June 9th 2007 will run 1 naked lap around State Circle. *See Addendum.

If any party gets arrested, all other parties will bail the arrested out.

Signed this 8th Day of June 2007.

Kristen Saunders

Matt Johnson

Patrick Noble

Addendum to Contract
Run takes place on St. Johns grounds, at a date to be agreed upon by both losing parties...Winner pays for drinks of both losing parties pre naked-run.

Addendum #2
If paparazzi is present at the site of the bet, the nakedness is off. No advertising, No bar people and NO cameras or video.

Addendum #2
Official Scrabble rules apply.

And a little commentary from me. I'd like to point out that I was not involved in the above participation part of this contract. Based on the fact that the actual written copy seems to be mostly in my handwriting, it might be a safe bet that I was an instigator. MIGHT. I am not taking responsibility however. I'd also like it noted that I'm pleased it's clear we can think reasonably while intoxicated as we changed the location from circling the freeking State House where cameras would be sure to capture this debauchery and further, we made sure everyone was covered in the event of an arrest. I love my friends.

*Last names changed to protect guilty parties.

Wednesday, October 7, 2009

It's Wednesday...

So, Nat and I are brainstorming martini ideas for his new job. While reading the history of the Manhattan to him the following conversation occurred.

Julie: ...Whiskers? Did I just say whiskers? I meant bitters.
Nat: I knew what you meant.
Julie: Maybe I should put mine wine glass down.
Nat: NO! We're drinking!

Monday, October 5, 2009

Night Notes at Treaty

When will I learn alcoholic beverages after intense workouts don't mix? I spent the morning doing a boot camp style workout with my friend Faith at Quiet Waters park on Saturday. After a lazy afternoon  I got my already sore muscles moving again and decided to go meet Newman and friends at Treaty for an innocent wine.  The weather was unseasonably warm and I had a hard time deciding on shoes but ultimately, I said, "Hi guys," when I choose these.

I mean, obviously, they do need a proper greeting.

So anyway, my shoes and I hobbled, strutted a couple of blocks down the brick sidewalks to meet and greet. I truly planned to have one little drink before heading back to my place for dinner with Mel.

Unfortunately, as best as I can remember, I forgot to eat something before I left. Then Newman left before Mel arrived. Luckily, Ian and all his friends were still there so I casually ordered another Chardonnay. I'm assuming Ian had a friend named AJ because that's the only way I can explain a Night Note reference on my napkin! WHAT?! This was supposed to be a mellow evening. Not night note worthy. Let's just get to the notes and then I'll explain the anti-climatic conclusion of this short night.

Treaty of Paris 10-2-2009

"I love drinking in Annapolis. It feels like home." AJ

"I wanna offended. But I'm not." Jul

"I met this incredible liberal bitch." Ian

"If drinking alcoholic ice tea is wrong, I don't want to be right." Julie Anonymous


How did we end up drinking Jeremiah's sweet tea in a super size shot glass with ice cubes and straws on a classy wine night? Why were we discussing Weeds when the season finale was weeks ago? I can assure you I have no intelligent answer to this, but it would appear I was quite confident in my decision making skills at the time. With every intention of being small spenders, it's also a wonder Mel and I discarded our idea of dinner at my place to indulge in sushi at Joss. But really, who can blame us?

So I have dimly lit, blurry memories of Aji Ponzu, Spring Rolls, Seared Torro, Tuna/Avacado rolls and I doubt I need to mention that last glass of wine. With a March Savannah trip in the works, we walked back to my house where I apparently posted a little tweet and slipped into a deep slumber.  My only explanation for this behavior is being dehydrated from my workout.

For the record, Sunday I was productive. I don't want any misconceptions that I frequently go antique shopping, but I had been meaning to check out a certain shop near my house and finally did. Grabbed some groceries, made banana bread, then fixed lunch for Nat. Very much against my will, we spent the afternoon watching Shawshank Redemption, which I grudgingly had to admit was good. I'm not saying I liked or enjoyed it, but it was a good movie. See? I'm not a drunk.

Haiku Monday...

As always, my Friday, Saturday, Sunday, weekend breakdown.

Good book, couch and wine.
Workout, hot shoes, drinks with friends.
Shawshank Redemption.

Now, I know you want to share your weekends with me 5-7-5 style!