Friday, August 28, 2009

The Need to Cry and "I'm on a boat."

The tears couldn't wait. I didn't want to be crazy crying chick in the car. It was overcast, but I snatched my sunglasses out of my purse to shield my eyes as my lip quivered and salty water spilled down my cheeks. The higher education gods had shot me down yet again. So that's not entirely true. Being the last minute person I am, I'd registered for my creative writing class last week, not realizing payment was due immediately. So when I was emailed at 5:20 pm that the school had dropped me from the class, my emotions got away from me and I couldn't handle the let down.

Not one to cry often, when I do, I make it a good one. Blubbering my whole 10 minute drive home, I plotted my plan of attack. How to release this brewing tantrum. Should I go for an angry run? Throw things? Have a relaxing soak in the tub with a bottle of vodk--I mean wine. By the time I parked my car and slammed the door satisfyingly loud, I decided a nice steamy shower sob would suffice. Nat would be upstairs in the loft. I'd verify we didn't need to be anywhere, then escape to the shower to wail away. I stomped into our house barely containing my cries.

"WHAT'S UP WOMAN?!?!" (That's what he says.)

No answer.

"Hey are you coming up here?"

I knew if I spoke a single word, all would be lost. Suddenly, from a female voice.

"Hello. Nat's mother is here." I heard the proverbial record screech.

"Hi," I choked out.

"We're watching Rachel Ray."

"Oh... I love her." (To myself. $%&#!!!!) How was I going to cry now?!?! I slinked away to our bedroom, gently shut the door, sat in the middle of the bed, pulled the blanket over my body, hugged my knees and utterly sobbed, huge heaving sobs into my legs. Quietly that is. I knew I didn't have long. I'd have to pull it together. That thought only made me cry harder. A couple minutes later, the door opened. He sat on the bed and put his arms around me before asking what was wrong. Explaining the situation, I sort of felt silly, but he knows my desire to finish my BA. Wiping my mascara stained cheeks, he informed me my ring tone on his new phone was now "Im on a Boat." (Waaaait for it.) There was no way I couldn't laugh at that.

So I pulled it together, washed my face then showed it. His Mom understood my need for a good cry. And like a kid who gets ice cream after skinning their knee, Nat took us for sushi.

The next day I was able to re-enroll into the class.

5 comments:

Eva Gallant said...

Don't you love when the man in your life is there for you with a hug when you need it?

glad you were able to enroll in the class after all.

One Sassy Girl said...

That's classic! We're all such girls. Crying tears for something that turns out not to be a problem. Well done, my dear ;)

Glad you made it into the class. Enjoy!

mylittlebecky said...

this may have well happened to me. ugh. why do we even NEED to cry? why is that even an option? *clap* that it all worked out :)

Stephanie Faris said...

Sometimes all we need is a good cry, but having someone who cares put his/her arm around me and show concern makes me cry even harder!

Michele said...

Thank you for visiting my blog. I'm glad you found me because that means I found you and I love your fabulous writing! Glad everything worked out with your class. I'll be back to visit you soon.