Saturday, February 28, 2009

Easter 2007, I'm not joking




Translation:

"Beeeeeandick"

"It's like healthy vodka wine" -Julie
"What seems to be the officer, problem?" Brandon

-irrefixable Julie

"You don't want the cab to know your drinking?" Jenks

"You're a liar" Cuz

"I'm not attractive when I make my gross face." Julie


And yes, before all that, we did make a mall stop for our Mom's. Unfortunately, there was a slight conflict in that the Bunny desperately wanted us to sit on his lap, and we, desperately did not. He kept tapping his knees with his eerily frozen on smile, but you see how we held our own.



Friday, February 27, 2009

One of the best Napkins of all time...

This is Jungle Juice Night 7/19/08. Vicki, this is for you!





Translation as follows:

Julie: I thought mixing brown and clear liquor was bad, but it's delicious.

Todd to Mel: I'm happy that your happy with your alcohol soaked rum
Mel: Rum?
Todd: Alcohol soaked fruit.

Andrea: Would you like a piece of paper?
Julie: No. It's a napkin thing.

Ben: Pearls aren't lost forever.

Jeff: It tasted like Will Smith.

Jules: how do you spell that?...
J-E-F-F.....that's Jeff!!

Todd: Anything good for you comes in a jar.

Mel: Todd, I love that youre diving into that rum-pineapple
Todd: It BURNS!
Jules: It does burn.

Ben: BEN STILLER HATE ON
-Ben & Julie High five to Stiller HATE!!!

*Everyone loves JASON LEE!!! (and hates Ben Stiller!)

Todd: You never know when you might need a fork

Vicki: Vomatosis

Andrea: ......jungle juice-occur?
Vicki: That's so out of context!

Vicki: Lays are close to my heart
Julie:Vicki!!!

Meredith: I'm going to go eat the fruit out of the jungle juice.
Julie: Oh! I'll meet you at the jingle juice.
Todd: Jingle Juice. JINGLE JUICE?!?! You mean JUNGLE Juice?!

Julie: I poured water instead of ice...except ice too!
Vicki: HA HA HA HA HA HA

"Downforward facing Rob"

...because Julie, you're drunk doing a headstand in a skirt!

Vicki: STOP STABBING ME WITH MADONNA OBJECTS.

Ben: Chicka Chicka Waaaa-------
Rob Frank: It sounds like an ass sexy hamburger

Ben: You're going to be sticky as hell in the morning


**Disclosure: Ultimately, there are a few more napkins and a few more things on those napkins after this that are completely unintelligible and or, not suitable for public consumption.



Tuesday, February 24, 2009

It takes one to know one...

I am a nice person. I swear I am. People like me. But lately, can I just admit that I have had to really work at being nice to the general population? And it's exhausting particularly when they're nice. For example, sometimes when I'm walking up several flights of stairs to work in the a.m., a person in front of me will stop and hold the door open for me to exit the stairwell. This being a premature exit, I am forced to smile through gritted teeth and explain that I have more flights to climb, and to be perfectly blunt, I'm just not yet ready to be friendly. So this is bitchy and uninspiring so I'll switch another topic. (Sort of.)

There's this Scroogey fellow who lives next to Nat and me. Long story short, he likes to post obnoxious signs in his yard about stuff. Most recently he posted a big old sign right by our house stating his displeasure in a dog scratching up dirt onto his driveway. To my dismay, I kept seeing neighbors look at the sign and then up to our house as though we were the McPosterson's. I let him get away with this for a solid 4 days before we were involved in a relocation battle of the sign. (My putting it on his side of his driveway, and him basically putting it on our porch) He's got a lot of retired man time on his hands, but I'm clever and inventive and was ready to take matters to the next level if necessary, so I was a tad disappointed when he not only gave up but removed his other signs. The next level you ask? Lets just say I'd be knocking out two squirrels with one twirl.... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X8YZIhlWpS0 (Fast forward along to around the 3:45 min mark)

This guy at my gym is always seductively stretching in non-stretch designated areas and its so fascinating to watch. Sometimes he walks on the treadmill and boxes. Monday he did two new things. First he was on a bike with an elastic band around his shoulders doing something crazylike. Then (and I couldn't make this up) he sauntered up to a stretching post and starting dancing to his ipod music! I was a tad alarmed at his pole dancing but also couldn't believe nobody else seemed amused by his behavior. I can't even describe an accurate visual of what he did next however it involved gyrating in a sexually explicit way that left nothing to the imagination as to what happens in this guys bedroom. I urge you to visit my gym on a guest pass. The workout will fly by you'll be so engrossed watching him! He's more entertaining than manorexic's laps at my old gym. But that's a story for another day...

Saturday, February 21, 2009

Lazy Sundays and Fun Fridays

A few weekends ago Mel, Vicki and I had the best weekend ever. We sipped Whiskey sours, per Rachel Ray magazine's suggestion at Morton's with Jenkins courtesy of Newman before visiting Eli and playing catch-phrase. Though not bright and early, we got up the next morning to walk downtown, get breakfast at the new yogurt place and take a few pictures. We weren't very inspired though I do like this shot of a bird.

A while back I did take this picture which I'm quite proud of, though I wasn't in Annapolis at the time. That's the Wilson Bridge.


I ventured south on Sunday to see Sarah's new baby. Three days new to be exact. He was all sorts of extra cute, and I couldn't help being enamored with him.

My mom was all, "What's 'tug-a-lug' doing?"

Speaking of my mom, we found time to get on a roller coaster, hit up the tropics with Ramone AND a photography studio while I was in town.




But enough about photo's and such. As I always say, it's the night's that you don't expect to be crazy that always end up most entertaining. We're still reeling at the loss of our favorite bar, that of which can not be named. Luckily, Tsunami stepped up to the plate and everyone put on their honest shoes and their drinking shoes. It made my heart smile straight through the night until morning when it starting to make my head spin and my stom heave. To remedy the situation, I placed an order for grease with a side of lard to be delivered and hunkered down on my couch for 3 hours of Gone with the Wind, while trying to not get too angry over the major unnecessary and tragic changes in the movie version of the story. Oh, but like I was saying, maybe it wasn't honesty as much as it was scandalously speaking without thinking. People said things along the lines of, "I like it when you come here," and "Her hips are bangin", and "NEEEEIGGH!!" and "You're so fucking hot I can't stand it." I didn't say any of those things though. Actually, I lied. I did partake in the "neigh-ing", but trust me. Just trust me, it was necessary.